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[goen]

Yaboku Tomioka

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[goen]

[ also doesn't notice because he's too busy hating baren ]

You wanna see bad aim? Then hold reaaaal still!

[ He starts beating flaming mistletoe bats directly at Baren... ]

[crudest]

[why does yato want to set baren on fire again last time went so poorly

but regardless he's just making an annoyed noise at that before batting these fiery bats into other bats??? since more are gathering? little ashy bat corpses fall around them....]

It's like you're not even trying!

[goen]

[ The squeaking of the bats grows louder
and louder
and louder
and louder
until it's all just

SQUEAKSQUSQUEAKSQUESQUEAAKSQUEAKSQUEAKDQUEESQUEESQUEAKSKWEESQUEAKSQUEE
SKWSKWSQUEESQUEAKSSSQUEASQUEEAAKKSQUEAKSQUEAKSQUSQUEASQUEAKSKWEEK
SQUEAKSQUSQUEAKITYSEUEAKSQUEESQUEAKSQUWAKSQUEEKSQUEAKSQUESQUSQUEAK

Yato shouts something, but it's hard to make out under all that jumbled Christmas-themed squeaking. ]

[crudest]

[Baren also shouts something.

But that's a lot of fucking bats.

so he's just gonna

flip yato off like that's going to help literally anything]

[goen]

[ more shouting from yato's end

and as the cloud of bats thickens around them, he grabs a fistful and straight up starts pitching them at baren's face ]

[crudest]

[he's going to matrix dodge these bats if they have to

none of what they're doing is actually helping them

but damned if baren isn't going to just to try to send some bats bowling back to yato too????

it's a tornado of bats]

[goen]

[ yato straight up punches and kicks the bats as they come at him

don't ask how

there are so many bats now that it's a wonder yato and baren can even see each other anymore ]

[crudest]

[they might not be able to

mostly because it'd be funny if baren tried to jump back to dodge a bat flying right toward his face and ended up slamming into yato]

[goen]

[ wow! baren wants to fight, huh?? well yato will fight!! despite this being the absolute worst time for it!!!

so yeah

time for some punching and kicking and wrestling until baren gets off him ]

[crudest]

[this is the actual worst and this thread is not going to get any better???

it's just a cacophony of mariah carey as baren is determined to be just as brutal to yato because why is this fucker picking a fight huh????

should they roll into some pond in the park?? they should.]

[goen]

[ and then that's how they died





except not i guess, against all odds

yato surfaces from the pond with a big splash, flops out, and looks to find baren, if only to try to drag him up and smash some mud in his face ]

[crudest]

[could i get a regain from this....

anyway that's a pretty shitty thing to do

another shitty thing to do is try to shove yato's head right back into the pond and hold it there]

[goen]

[ haha i think i know which one do it why not

yato flails around a lot, then after a few moments just kind of

goes limp ]

[crudest]

[i wish that baren wouldn't just walk away after committing murder

but yato's a god

he's probably fine

time to wander off]

[goen]

[ A CONCERNING AMOUNT OF TIME LATER:

SURPRISE YATO ISN'T DEAD (enough)... After a long, still silence, he erupts from the pond and proceeds to cough all the pondwater out of his lungs. More importantly than the fact that Baren just tried to drown him (that birdshit), he saw a memory. There's a cloud of mistletoe bats still swarming around him, but Yato ignores it in favor of staggering away to think about what it means.

thks fr the mmrs ig brn ]